[D5 LA] Tiff's Tiff and other Miscellany

[Tiffani]

"I walked out because I was hoping to avoid exactly what happened. It's why I said nothing. I just wasn't going to fight about it - and I wouldn't have if Chantelle hadn't come out after me and then blamed the whole thing on me," Tiffani explains. There doesn't seem to be any anger in her voice, just a statement of fact as she saw it.

"I feel defeated, Jack. I do. Like ... I just don't have any fight left in me. It's obvious to me that the three of you have a connection I don't have." She shrugs one of her shoulders. "As I said before, I'm trying. I'm really trying ... but it's a battle I fear I'm losing. This ... this world of Changelings - it's not for me, it's not who I am ... whatever. I'm not explaining it very well. Maybe I need mortal friends ... or something."

Then she looks mildly confused. "Uh ... why would I think about white bears? Besides, you can't not think of a white bear unless you think about them. It's a paradox."

[Jack Doyle]

"Right." he nodded. "It's hard not to think of something you're told not to. I'm not sure it's even possible."

[Tiffani]

"Nope ... it's impossible. That's why it's a paradox."

She walks purposefully one department away from electronics to the office furniture where a large number of office chairs were on display. She then spends several minutes sitting down in one chair after another, kicking up her legs, giving it a spin, leaning it back as far as it would go and messing with the little levers raising the chair up and down to see just how high or low she could get it to go.

She seems to settle on a high-backed chair made partly of leather - almost certainly simulated - and plush cloth. She raises the chair as high as it would go, letting her feet dangle several inches above the floor.

"Uh, Jack ... I'm wondering ... why you asked me about white bears. I mean, is this little thought experiment part of a larger point that I'm not getting? Or did you really just want to know if it was possible to deliberately not think of something without thinking about it?"

[Jack Doyle]

"It occured to me that my reassurances weren't likely to help." he explained. "Telling someone not to worry about something is likely to make them think of things to worry about. That was where my own suspicions came from."

[Tiffani]

"Oh, I see ..." she says nodding once in agreement. "Well, if it makes you feel any better, I'm probably going to worry about it no matter what anyone says - or doesn't say. It's just not the kind of thing you can pretend isn't happening. Rather, it's like something that hangs over your head like a Sword of Damocles."

She makes herself rather comfortable in that office chair, leaning it back as she puts her feet up onto another adjacent chair.

"Hmm ... bed, desk, chair, television ... oh dear, it almost slipped my mind ..." She practically launches herself out of the chair and starts heading back to the furniture department assuming Jack is following her. There, she strolls right up to a television stand that isn't all that different from the bookshelf or the computer desk - all glass and chrome.

"I almost forgot that these new ... these flat screen TVs don't sit on the floor the way old TVs used to. I'd actually like to hang mine on the wall but, heh, I don't have the skills to do that. I'm afraid I might ruin the walls. Anyway, Jack, since we're currently in the business of talking, is there anything else you want to know - about me, about the situation, about anything - that might help you understand? Or do you know pretty much all you really need to?"

[Jack Doyle]

"There will always be more questions, but it may be best not to ask some." he shrugged. "Not everything needs an answer."

[Tiffani]

Tiffani laughs lightly, a sound that echoes of irony more than humor. "Yeah ... that's the way things are. Why it is so difficult to get to know anyone. Of course I wasn't referring to questions that dig into my durance and whatnot. Just ... general questions. You know, the kind of questions everyone asks of each other when they're still in that 'getting to know you better' stage."

She looks around the store, standing on her tip-toes to see over the shelves of items and others shopping. "I'm just going to snag a computer and then I'm pretty well done. I'm assuming we have internet back at the apartment? After that, it's the dreaded clothes shopping. If you really want to stay through that hell, you're welcome to, but I figured you might use that time to talk to Chantelle."

She heads toward the computer and computer parts department though she walks more slowly this time, her mind obviously elsewhere at the moment.

[Jack Doyle]

"I'm not sure everyone asks the same questions." he chuckled. "Different interests, Different priorities. Different situations. And there's that awkward uncertainty and nervousness that can jumble your thoughts up."

"Are you sure you don't want me to stay?"

[Tiffani]

"Hmmm," Tiffani utters in this pensive tone. "I guess that's all the more reason to ask qestions. If we were all the same, we would already know the answer to everything. Hold on a second, I have to ask one of these people which computer to get because, honestly, I have no idea."

She moves off to speak with a salesman - which takes a little bit of time considering she had no idea about RAM and CPU power and graphics cards much less what to buy. However, after doing that, the sales clerk takes one of the computers up to the front of the store.

"So ..." she says to Jack upon returning. "Yeah ... I was thinking more light-hearted questions, not the kind to bring back horrible painful memories or anything." Giving him a little enigmatic smile, she continues, "Oh, and if you want to stick around while I go clothes shopping, well, sure you can. I just know most men get frustrated with women shopping for clothes - all the looking and trying stuff on. Worse, I'm a teenager with money."

She giggles at her own thought. "Anyhow, yeah, I mean, if you want to stick around, you can. I just don't know how, uh ... entertained you'll be."

[Jack Doyle]

He shrugged. "I don't think I've ever been shopping."